Ebony and Ivory

Now the weather is changing for better, the fight for sun worshipping spots has begun along with the vast range of fashion statements that accompany that hobby. By contrast now the sun is high in the sky there is also a scrabble for comfortable areas of shade, you must decide if you are "Ebony or Ivory". At the blunt of the ship (technical nautical term) there is a series of ascending decks that the sun loungers are arranged on if you go to the top deck and look down towards the pool, it's like staring at a surreal tin of sardines. As the heat rises several ladies rise together to go and rehydrate, for modesty they put on diafonous robes made of chiffon and as the wind catches them it looks like an early morning mist off the Yorkshire Moors. At breakfast in the Conservatory this morning over my croissant I was taken with the range of gentleman's shorts were on display from so short and tight you would have to sing soprano, Lycra's that would not be out of place on the Tour de France, M&S finest tailored shorts and last but not least those as worn by Lofty on It ain't half hot Mum, almost as big as the person wearing them, big enough to have a folding bicycle in the pocket and bell tent in the other pocket and they are fitted out with guttering in case of rain. They should be listed as National Monuments. In many cases these sartorial statements of elegance are enhanced by devastating foot apparel, knee length black socks with trainers, argyle socks with open toe sandals and my own personal favourites so far, white tennis socks with a pair of zip up Chelsea boots. We are still two days from Antigua I am hoping that when we hit land that I might spot a Pith Helmet.